Schools!
Please kill me! l hate this, l hate this.....everyone is having a baby and is happy in this fucking country. l cant take it anymore l just want to move away, but its so fucking hard to just find a school. l have been looking and searching after schools for 3 years, and then finally l get in to the school but then l dont get any internship, l search 146 internship but l got nada. Now l´m looking for a school in US, then there is so much information on every homepages of the schools so l cant find any information.gahh hates it. l know my spelling is bad right now, but l dont care because l´m fucking angry and no one can ever heöp me. stupid people.
Goodbye!!!!
Goodbye!!!!
Today is a good day!!
Yes all my friends, Especially my lovely sisters(muuhaha) and of course My one and only Jenny :))
You maybe never thought l would say this but guess what, l´m happy and this time l´m truely happy.
l cant stop smiling you make me so happy. l cant describe it, everything just feels so totally right with you.Where have you been all my life, l start to wonder :)
l´m blessed with the best people in the world. My friends are the finest. l have maaannny friends, but l only love a few, and the most important l only open up for a few.
You might say you know me but you don´t really know me. l´m not always the happy girl you see on the outside, l´m so much more.
Yes l´m a happy girl. I laugh and joke a lot especially at work.
My Co-workers use to say that l´m always happy and then they are fast to ask what´s wrong if l had a bad day :)
You also think that l´m a bully, that l´m always a (good) girl but that´s so not me.
You always get so suprised when l´m telling you that l´m a shy girl.You laugh and said it can not be. You are always an social person who talk to everyone. Its true, but l´m also shy in the beginning :)
l use to say to you that l´m one person at work an another in my privat life, you never believe me but when you get a chance to hang out with me outside work you all get suprised.
I got so glad when you told me " You are not like you are at work,now l see a whole new side of you. You are a good person, l can really sit down and talk to you"
"Surprising"
I´m acctually a nice girl in my private life, l don´t have long to laugh and l love to enjoy my friends and make them laugh as well. If l want to l can also be a totally crazy impulsive girl and d what l feel doing. I´m not afraid to be honest either.
It´s hard to explaine me, you gotta see and experience me to see who l´m really are, haha....
So people out there dont judge and put people in to folders that fast, get to know them instead, Just say Hey, who are you can open up for a new friendship. Swedish people are to afraid to let people in.
You only live once and you need to take care of that once.
Like l said so many people are saying ohh l wanted to see that country,, ohh l wanted to educate me in that ohh l want a lige like them...so what are you waiting for stop look dream and look at the pictures, explore the pictures instead and remember how fun you had at that picture :)
Love you all....Especially You!! <3
puss och kram!!
Mår dåligt!
Jag mår dåligt, är sjuk och inte ens då får man vara ifred. Varför är man så egoistisk som människa? Varför vill man inte att andra ska få må bra.
Ola säger då:
"Man skall ändå ej klaga, blir bjuden på nylagad mat varje dag, städning(ibland), diskning etc. Kan man ha det bättre? Nej tror inte det.
Frågan jag då ställer mig är att fine, han gör vissa saker i hemmet, men ska man behöva utstå hårda sårande ord bara för det och t.om. bli tillslagen för att han gör ovanstående. Ska man behöva leva med att alltid må så här dåligt då han inte ser hur mycket han sårar mig utan han säger bara att man inte kan ha det bättre.
Jag är trött på att han får sådana utbrott, jobbigt att aldrig kunna veta när det slår om, som nu när jag har varit sjuk och varit hemma ifrån jobb då jag har mått väldigt dåligt och han kommer hem mitt i natten och väcker mig genom att skrika på mig för att jag inte satt in 2 glas i diskmaskinen. Är det normalt beteende?
Jag är så trött på det.....Snälla, ge mig styrka!
Dessutom vart finns Robitussin när jag behöver det :((( Varför måste det vara olagligt i Sverige:((
Jag flyttar nästa vecka, ska bli så skönt!!
pussss
Ola säger då:
"Man skall ändå ej klaga, blir bjuden på nylagad mat varje dag, städning(ibland), diskning etc. Kan man ha det bättre? Nej tror inte det.
Frågan jag då ställer mig är att fine, han gör vissa saker i hemmet, men ska man behöva utstå hårda sårande ord bara för det och t.om. bli tillslagen för att han gör ovanstående. Ska man behöva leva med att alltid må så här dåligt då han inte ser hur mycket han sårar mig utan han säger bara att man inte kan ha det bättre.
Jag är trött på att han får sådana utbrott, jobbigt att aldrig kunna veta när det slår om, som nu när jag har varit sjuk och varit hemma ifrån jobb då jag har mått väldigt dåligt och han kommer hem mitt i natten och väcker mig genom att skrika på mig för att jag inte satt in 2 glas i diskmaskinen. Är det normalt beteende?
Jag är så trött på det.....Snälla, ge mig styrka!
Dessutom vart finns Robitussin när jag behöver det :((( Varför måste det vara olagligt i Sverige:((
Jag flyttar nästa vecka, ska bli så skönt!!
pussss
:)
Hey,
l´m back again :)
If you use to read my blogg then you also know that l only use to write when l´m sad or deppressed but...
Now l would love to change that and also try to write when l´m happy :)
If you know me then you probably already know that l´m (always) a happy girl and l love to make people laugh, and do you know what. in 9 of 10 times l use to get someone to laugh...good or what :PPP
l Know my sisters is reading my blogg a lot so l just want to say to you my sisters, Therese and Charlotte that you are the best sisters in the World. l would never be the person lm today if it wasn´t for you two.
Therese, if l wouldn´t look up to you l would never have gone to the states to be an aupair like you did.
It was my best year ever and l was so totally happy l can´t even describe it, for the first time in my life l felt like a whole person. l felt like a fit in.
I had the best friends, we had so much fun together.lucky me l use to hang out with some Swedish friends that l still keep in touch with, some more then others and even you Linda. From the first moment that l met you l knew you where a keeper :) We spent one year in US togeteher but seperately.
You lived in Boston and l lived in NY. We spoke every day over the phone and l was so scared to get a call from you because of you crazy girl and the police was not getting along to well., l though u should be sent back home to Sweden hahaha, but lucky u stayed and we tried to meet eachother so often we could, u came to NY to visit me and l came to Boston to Visit you and we always had so much fun...l was laughing so much so l cried.
Then we went on the last trip together and l wouldn´t pick any other to do my last trip with. We say San Fransisco, LA, Venice beach, Beverly hills, hollywood, Las Vegas etc and even flew over Grand Canyon cause we overslept and miss the bus, but look at the bright side, if we should take the bus we wouldn´t have time to party all night long and we would never have met Basil and his friends, l think lm dying hahahhahahah...Bassiiillll....He was sick.
Then we even flew back to Sweden together and now we have been neighbors for years and we are hanging out so little, shame on us, most me a guess :)
Now my lovely best friend you are getting married this summer with the best guy ever, l couldn´t wish you any better guy for you you are like bill and bull. You deserv to be happy so much and l can see how much you love eachother, its like you meet eachother yesterday, just so you know l´m going to cry on your wedding :)
Then we have you Charlotte, you never went to the states like an aupair, you would call home and cry after a week and want to go home. l´m not telling you that to be mean but you know what l mean, you are not like me. l´m crazy and do totally crazy things and want to explore, you are more down to earth and love to be close to our family. l´m glad that l have you that close to me, because when l needed help and l didnt want to tell mum and dad l could always count on you. Even if l sometimes can be crazy over that you care so much for me, you want to know exactly where i´m all the time and call and text me then l know you only do that cause you love me, cause you are my totally best friend.
l know that you would be crazy inside you and worried for me if l moved to the states, but you need to let me go a little, you have a baby coming that you need to take care of and l promise you, l will be fine. l can take care of myself and if l miss you or you miss me, l´m only a phonecall away, just pick of the phone and say l miss you and l will respond l miss you to and no l´m not walking alone in the middle of the night l promise :)
Then we have you Jenny, my other half, l could write for hours about you because you use to say there is no one like you but its really true about you. No one is like you. You have been there in every way in good and in bads. l cant describe enough how much that means to me. Which friend wake her firend up to say that we celebrate my name today.
Then you also know that l´m a fighter and l never quite before l got what l want, Now l want to reach my dream so l´m going to search for a vet tech education on a community college in the United States of America. If l get in to the school i´m moving to US in March next year.
The education is about 1 year and 3 month, but then my plan is to stay in the US, l need to follow my heart and my heart and happiness belongs to the States.
Until March next year l need to continue my living here so my plans right now is to finish my school and then be studying a lot so l can get a good grade on my final test in August. cross the fingers :)
Then l got a wake up call today when a gym instructor arrived at work with a machine that can measure your body fat in %, your BMI and who much you need to loose. l was overweight :) a women should have a BMI between 19-25. l had 26.1 so l need to loose 8,9kg. It takes 5 week so that is my next goal.l need to train the condition for my asthma and then l need to get stronger in my back and then loose weight so l´m fit for fight when we will arrive in Miami in June.
l maybe not have told you all but l´m on vacation in America from 16 june- 18 july. 3 weeks in Miami and 1 week in NYC. We are going to have so much fun and l will meet up with my hostfamily in NYC :)) l miss my kids :)
Then l will be going to my best friends bachelorette party and wedding. l will also fix a lot in my new apartment so im gonna be a really busy women :)
Here is the paper from the body fat machine,
Then Sweety-poo l got your message and l miss you damn much as well!
l´ll be there!
l´m back again :)
If you use to read my blogg then you also know that l only use to write when l´m sad or deppressed but...
Now l would love to change that and also try to write when l´m happy :)
If you know me then you probably already know that l´m (always) a happy girl and l love to make people laugh, and do you know what. in 9 of 10 times l use to get someone to laugh...good or what :PPP
l Know my sisters is reading my blogg a lot so l just want to say to you my sisters, Therese and Charlotte that you are the best sisters in the World. l would never be the person lm today if it wasn´t for you two.
Therese, if l wouldn´t look up to you l would never have gone to the states to be an aupair like you did.
It was my best year ever and l was so totally happy l can´t even describe it, for the first time in my life l felt like a whole person. l felt like a fit in.
I had the best friends, we had so much fun together.lucky me l use to hang out with some Swedish friends that l still keep in touch with, some more then others and even you Linda. From the first moment that l met you l knew you where a keeper :) We spent one year in US togeteher but seperately.
You lived in Boston and l lived in NY. We spoke every day over the phone and l was so scared to get a call from you because of you crazy girl and the police was not getting along to well., l though u should be sent back home to Sweden hahaha, but lucky u stayed and we tried to meet eachother so often we could, u came to NY to visit me and l came to Boston to Visit you and we always had so much fun...l was laughing so much so l cried.
Then we went on the last trip together and l wouldn´t pick any other to do my last trip with. We say San Fransisco, LA, Venice beach, Beverly hills, hollywood, Las Vegas etc and even flew over Grand Canyon cause we overslept and miss the bus, but look at the bright side, if we should take the bus we wouldn´t have time to party all night long and we would never have met Basil and his friends, l think lm dying hahahhahahah...Bassiiillll....He was sick.
Then we even flew back to Sweden together and now we have been neighbors for years and we are hanging out so little, shame on us, most me a guess :)
Now my lovely best friend you are getting married this summer with the best guy ever, l couldn´t wish you any better guy for you you are like bill and bull. You deserv to be happy so much and l can see how much you love eachother, its like you meet eachother yesterday, just so you know l´m going to cry on your wedding :)
Then we have you Charlotte, you never went to the states like an aupair, you would call home and cry after a week and want to go home. l´m not telling you that to be mean but you know what l mean, you are not like me. l´m crazy and do totally crazy things and want to explore, you are more down to earth and love to be close to our family. l´m glad that l have you that close to me, because when l needed help and l didnt want to tell mum and dad l could always count on you. Even if l sometimes can be crazy over that you care so much for me, you want to know exactly where i´m all the time and call and text me then l know you only do that cause you love me, cause you are my totally best friend.
l know that you would be crazy inside you and worried for me if l moved to the states, but you need to let me go a little, you have a baby coming that you need to take care of and l promise you, l will be fine. l can take care of myself and if l miss you or you miss me, l´m only a phonecall away, just pick of the phone and say l miss you and l will respond l miss you to and no l´m not walking alone in the middle of the night l promise :)
Then we have you Jenny, my other half, l could write for hours about you because you use to say there is no one like you but its really true about you. No one is like you. You have been there in every way in good and in bads. l cant describe enough how much that means to me. Which friend wake her firend up to say that we celebrate my name today.
Then you also know that l´m a fighter and l never quite before l got what l want, Now l want to reach my dream so l´m going to search for a vet tech education on a community college in the United States of America. If l get in to the school i´m moving to US in March next year.
The education is about 1 year and 3 month, but then my plan is to stay in the US, l need to follow my heart and my heart and happiness belongs to the States.
Until March next year l need to continue my living here so my plans right now is to finish my school and then be studying a lot so l can get a good grade on my final test in August. cross the fingers :)
Then l got a wake up call today when a gym instructor arrived at work with a machine that can measure your body fat in %, your BMI and who much you need to loose. l was overweight :) a women should have a BMI between 19-25. l had 26.1 so l need to loose 8,9kg. It takes 5 week so that is my next goal.l need to train the condition for my asthma and then l need to get stronger in my back and then loose weight so l´m fit for fight when we will arrive in Miami in June.
l maybe not have told you all but l´m on vacation in America from 16 june- 18 july. 3 weeks in Miami and 1 week in NYC. We are going to have so much fun and l will meet up with my hostfamily in NYC :)) l miss my kids :)
Then l will be going to my best friends bachelorette party and wedding. l will also fix a lot in my new apartment so im gonna be a really busy women :)
Here is the paper from the body fat machine,
Then Sweety-poo l got your message and l miss you damn much as well!
l´ll be there!
l lost my everything!
Why am l so stupid?
Why do l always hurt the people that loves me and only want me well.
l only want you to trust me, but over and over again l just let you down.
It´s now time for me to pay. l need to learn a lesson, and the big lesson is that l just lost you.
The one and only in my life is now gone and its all my fault.
l´m heartbroken and l know that l broke your heart as well. l just want everything to be a dream or if l could turn back the time, but unfortunaly its not possible so done is done and l need to learn to live with it.
You are such an amazing person, l´ve never met someone like you. You are really special for me, and l know you are my one in life, thats what´s hurting me the most, That l really find my one and l just let you go.
You put a smile on my face, you show me how much you really care, you gave me a warm feeling that l´m someone to count on and not worthless, you took the time to get to know me even if l´m not that easy to be around all the time. You really meant the world to me.
l keep loosing the people l love what´s wrong with me? Why do l need to push everyone away. Why can´t l only oppen my heart and let people in, just give them a chance. Only once!!
This Time l was really ready to try to open my heart for you and really give you a chance, but now its to late, its just to start all over again.
kisses!!
Why do l always hurt the people that loves me and only want me well.
l only want you to trust me, but over and over again l just let you down.
It´s now time for me to pay. l need to learn a lesson, and the big lesson is that l just lost you.
The one and only in my life is now gone and its all my fault.
l´m heartbroken and l know that l broke your heart as well. l just want everything to be a dream or if l could turn back the time, but unfortunaly its not possible so done is done and l need to learn to live with it.
You are such an amazing person, l´ve never met someone like you. You are really special for me, and l know you are my one in life, thats what´s hurting me the most, That l really find my one and l just let you go.
You put a smile on my face, you show me how much you really care, you gave me a warm feeling that l´m someone to count on and not worthless, you took the time to get to know me even if l´m not that easy to be around all the time. You really meant the world to me.
l keep loosing the people l love what´s wrong with me? Why do l need to push everyone away. Why can´t l only oppen my heart and let people in, just give them a chance. Only once!!
This Time l was really ready to try to open my heart for you and really give you a chance, but now its to late, its just to start all over again.
kisses!!
